finish line

The Del Close Marathon has come and gone. People have ranted and raved over their favorite shows and blogged about their New York minute. For a second straight year, I didn't go. This year, though, there's a difference.

I don't care that I wasn't there.

I don't miss cheating a few hours of sleep in-between my must-see shows only to stumble back over to the theater in hopes that the line to get back in isn't horrid. I don't miss meeting people and watching them try to gauge whether or not I'm important enough to be worth their time. I don't miss the week or two it takes to repair my sleep schedule when it's all said and done.

Sure, I'm sad that there are people I didn't get to see. Sure, I'm a little put off that friends of mine are getting high praise and I wasn't there to see it happen. At the end of the day, though, I'm happier to have missed the hassels than I am upset to have missed the wonders.

So this means either that I'm becoming a cranky old man at the tender age of 27 or it means that I may be more done with improv than originally thought. If I am experiencing a little bit of the improv burn out in spite of a summer away from it, you'll have to give me that I have plenty of reason.

The nonsense really took most of the joy out of improv. I still don't like that situation, and in retrospect feel it was even more unnecessary than even my original thoughts. In spite of things becoming a little more relaxed between the two theaters, I still would hear an odd word here-or-there that reminded me that there was probably still more hard feelings than anyone would let on. I did what I could to make light of the situation, but the fact that it seems like it will always be somewhat hanging over everyone's head can really feel like a punch to the gut.

Even beyond that, I was starting to get more and more frustrated by DSI. The cycle would go like this: (1) I would get frustrated and consider quitting, (2) There would be a pep rally of some sort promising changes, (3) I would generally be in favor of the changes and get excited, (4) I would be in a really fun show and get really excited, (5) Something at some level would get start to get under my skin, (6) it would fester and then the cycle would repeat.

I do think that DSI is losing the parts of itself that drew me into it one bit at a time. That's not necessarily a bad thing for DSI(they seem to be doing quite well), but it means that my place in all of that isn't there anymore. I've marinated on that thought for a good bit and I'm cool with it.

I'm cool with it.